I am my past, my present, and my future.
I exist because I chose to.
But there are times that it felt like I want to vanish into thin air.
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Where I thought that leaving is the only option that I ever knew.
But why do we exist?
What’s the purpose of our existence?
Was it to expose us to the mistakes that we did in the past?
The questions never end.
And it’s breaking my heart.
Because as I deal with one serious issue, it would lead me to another one.
Like it’s a web prepared to trap a confused person like me.
Lost. Broken. Depressed.
I chose to exist believing that I have a purpose in life.
My dreams. You. Us.
That’s where I want to go.
Until then I could say that I did well.
If you would see me in the corner, and ask me “How I’m doing? ”
Well, I will answer that I am doing pretty well.
As I sit down on the shore looking at the setting of the sun with my future at the back of my mind.
I would smile knowing that I made it because you were there for me. I was living with me in my second chance in life.
Once upon a time, my life was miserable. I was plagued by pain, wrong decisions, and mistakes.
That I thought was my becoming.
I figured I am created to instill pain, and I did well.
I felt like I was standing on the clouds.
That no one could ever touch me.
No one could ever tell me what’s right or wrong and no one would question me.
It was all about me; my feelings, my emotions, my welfare.
I am superior. Believing I am special until I realized I was alone and empty. And I learned the hard way. It was painful to fall.
I’ve lost all the glory that’s used to be mine.
My age has taken its toll.
And the odds are not mine anymore.
There are no more safe sides.
Even if I cry in the middle of the night, no one will listen.
I’ve pushed them too far to bring them close to me again.
I cried for help. I’ve knocked, but nobody opened their doors. Pity.
I’ve accumulated so much selfishness that I gave so much pain to everyone else who loved me.
When I looked back over my shoulder, I can see people bleeding in pain because of what I did to them.
I needed them.
But I cut the ropes that are supposed to connect me with them a long time ago and burned the bridge that’s supposed to bring them to me.
And I used to think that I don’t owe them anything.
I was proud.
No one could tell me what to do and what to say.
People, relationship, love are there for display.
I stepped on them to reach the top. I used them.
Loved the people that surrounded me with conditions.
“What’s in it for me?” are the words written in my mind and heart.
That was a long time ago.
The story of my life. My existence.
It’s all over now. I already found my real purpose in life.
And I am much happier now.
Knowing that I’m living my second chance in life, my second chapter.m
My second chance is fulfilling because after all, I found you.
And I am ready to start again.
Fred is a passionate virtual professional who wants to teach his countrymen about the opportunity of working online. He advocates that the Internet is not just for Facebook, YouTube, and online game usage. On this site, he gathers established professionals, CEO's, freelancers, business owners and influencers and asked for their insights that will provide an overview of how you can start as a virtual professional. He aims to support and help those who want to become an effective virtual professional.
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